Recently, a male friend of mine asked me the one question whose answer I both laugh at and choke on: “What should a man say to a woman during sex?” Well, I did laugh with a lusty cackle. However, I choked up when I went on with the answer. But I took a deep breath, and here goes:
When a man is seducing a woman, he can begin with kisses, and between those kisses is his chance to murmur in her ear, or to back away slightly, look the woman in the eyes and say, “You’re so beautiful.” Or, “I love looking into your eyes.” But he can’t give any more details than that. Let the tone of the foreplay give up the details. A woman’s imagination is going to drive her to seek the truth in her man’s heart when he looks in her eyes. So, friend, you will know what it means when someone says, “The answer is in the eyes of the beholder,” because as you look into her eyes, her soul opens up with every kiss, every climb to the next level of the act of lovemaking.
Speaking of lovemaking, you can tell when it turns into something on the edge of more–more than just sex, more than just appetite, more than just desire. It’s like you can’t get close enough to her, and that’s when you tell your to-be lover just that: “I can’t get close enough to you.” Again, you are not to give any details. It will spoil the effect of deflowering her. I know a man’s idea of the ultimate climax is to just do the deed, but it makes for better sex if you both enjoy each other, giving each other the same elements of pleasure.
Friend, as you peek, tell her, “I feel so incredible.” Don’t be afraid to take a deep breath because she is giving to you what you want. Just do it in her ear. Feel the moment and caress your lover’s entire body. Go ahead and put her face in your hands. These tiny little touches will say big words to her.
Now, I know some people can’t hold back from saying the L-word, with “I” and “you” sandwiching it, but you just might be so caught up in the act by now that your pleasure speaks for you. This can be tricky, especially when you are fresh to this relationship. You must follow up after you finish by telling her that you feel for her and think she feels for you; however, also be firm by saying that getting serious too quickly can spoil what you have going, or something to that effect. Just practice before you ever do utter that half-hearted sentence (unless you do feel that way, of course). Then, by all means (if you do, that is), shout it out after you both finish and when she is in your arms.
So now is when I take a deep breath and relax. I have done my part in smoothing over, possibly, the worst question a friend can throw at you. Hopefully, when you answer, he will thank you for being his friend and giving him an honest opinion.